Reflections — Well, I expected that to be truly terrible (and I’m a legitimate Food Network fan). Emeril was a terrible emcee. They would be much better off with Alton Brown. (He presented, but he could have done much more.) All in all, not a bad effort. I like most of the categories. Seems like there were lots more that they could have covered. But I’ll watch again next year.

10.29 — Emeril is wrapping up. He thanks everyone in Miami, all the viewers, and everyone else. “Keep eating. Keep cooking. Keep Watching.” Whatever you say, Emeril.

10.23 — The category is Best New Technology. The Trivection Oven sounds cool. A combination of microwave and convection oven. I need to get me one of those. Then there’s the “Intelligent Oven.” It’s both refrigerator and oven. You stick your food in it in the morning, and it cooks it at the appointed time. You can also log into via the Internet and change the settings. Very cool. But it doesn’t win. Something called the anti-griddle does. A device only a whacky chef could love.

10.20 — Sandra Lee’s dress is two sizes two big. Dude. Get a stylist.

10.16 — Here comes the Delicious Destinations category. First, Portland, OR. Yep. Looks pretty good. Especially the Dungeness Crab. The piece stresses proximity to a huge diversity of fresh local ingredients. Second, Minneapolis. (?!) The narrator mentions a “burgeoning food scene” and “old world flavors.” Uh-huh. Then, “walleye.” I’ll take the Dungeness Crab. Third, Portland, Maine. “Where the words food and passion seem synonymous.” So, lemme get this straight. All the towns in the United States, and Food Network manages to come up with TWO named Portland? Okay, Emeril is announcing the winner. Shocker! It’s Portland. (Er, Oregon.)

10.15 — Bobby Flay is wearing a funky suit. But he’s the only one in the cast who looks decent.

10.10 — Cardinals first baseman Albert Pujols, along with his lovely wife, turn up to present the Viewers Choice award for favorite comfort food. Burgers and Fries win in a route. Macaroni in Cheese is a distant fifth place. Strange graphic appears: “Campbells salutes burgers and fries.” A moment ago, one read, “Campbells salutes Julia Child.” Hmmmm. Something seems not quite right.

10.07 — The Food Network bestoes its first induction into its Food Hall of Fame to Julia Child. Well, duh. Julia was there first, thirty years before anyone had the notion of putting food on television. She’s the dominant force in TV food. Period. Emeril accepts on Julia’s behalf — he was friends with her — and gives a tearful acceptance speech. “She was an inspiration,” he says. Definitely.

10.03 — The Humanitarian Award goes to Chef Floyd Cardoz of Tabla in New York. He did some incredible work for victims of Katrina, especially Gulf Coast shrimpers.

9.58 — Alton Brown presents the award for “Playing with Your Food.” This is cool. These folks get paid to paint, photograph, and sculpt food. The work is amazing. UPDATE: The last nominee has a food painting with the Olson Twins. Where’s MKH? The winner is a gelatin sculptur. Seriously. I can’t make this stuff up.

9.50 — Best Ballpark food. This one was decided by votes on foodtv.com. The nominees: The baseball parks in Philly, Seattle, San Francisco and Baltimore. Citizen’s Bank Park in Philly wins. Hard to argue with that. They’ve got Gino’s Cheesesteaks.

9.48 — The Better Burger category just unveiled, and In-n-Out wasn’t even nominated. Some Seattle shop called Better Burger picked up the award. Pshaw. Everyone knows that In-n-Out is the best.

9.36 — OMG. It’s a live musical performance from G-Luv. He’s singing a song called “Hot Cookin”. I have nothing to add. I’m positively speechless.

9.30 — Three nominees for best Super Market, and I shop all of them. Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods and Wegman’s. I would have voted for Wegman’s, and sure enough, it wins. Wegman’s is as much a resutaurant as a grocery store, and it’s got amazing kosher and organic selections. The award is well deserved.

9.16 — Whoah! What is Nigella wearing? She looks awful. Like someone put her in her dress by way of a shoehorn.

9.06 — It’s on. The first category. “Hot Chocolate”? I haven’t heard of any of these convectionaries. The winner? Don’t know. Missed it. And besides, Woodhouse Chocolates in Napa Valley should have won.

That’s right. It’s the first annual Food Network Awards. The first I heard of it was today, but that’s appointment television. I’m there. And I’ll try post a few reflections here as the evening wears on.